My first time at Great Ormond St Hospital. Wow! It’s amazing

Today was my first schlep to GOSH and my oh my what w difference from Whipps Cross, our nearest hospital and part of St. Barts like GOSH. What a difference, no snot, blood or shit on the corridors or the toilets. Everybody was really bloody nice, helpful, informative. Shows the difference a camera crew(s)  can make.

Everywhere there were WII boxes for the kids to play on Mario and WiiSports, fusball, softplays. Nurses and clinical assistants everywhere. It felt like a hospital should be.

So DD1 has been diagnosed with psoraitic arthritis, so we have a few more trips to GOSH for additional scans and tests and then back to Whipps Cross for intravenous steroid treatment. Except the doctor and consultant did the treatment a slight disservice, by saying that the intravenous drugs are used in chemotherapy. I saw the pain that my wife went through with chemo during her breast cancer treatment, even a watered down version for an 8 yo girl is not going to be pleasant.

DD1 was a tough little sprog today, the phlebotomist use an anaesthetic spray but DD1 vein collapsed so she had to use the back of her hand. So she got stuck twice, the phlebotomist kept on wiggling the needle to get a better flow. It must have been agony for DD1. Then the needle clotted after only filling two vials, so the other six had to be filled by upending DD1’s hand after pulling the canula and letting her blood drip into the vials. Most would tut-tut at that point and go, stick her again in a different vein with a larger bore needle. I think the phlebotomist and attending nurses made the right call. DD1 had been stuck twice, a third one and she’d have seriously melted down and developed a life long needle phobia.

We had a pleasant time wandering around Bloomsbury and Lambs Conduit, I bought DD1 a small art kit in a wooden box and we walkef past the UAL University of Art London, she got all excited and has decided that that is the Uni she wants to go to. I’m feeling a bit down at the moment, although today has been good it still add to the litany of misfortune we seem to go through. Luckily for everyone I have a keen sense of duty and will push all of my feelings down now for the sake of the kids and make sure we get through this with out a crash and burn. Then once things are level again and we have stability and income, then I’m going to go on holiday, no stupid school fees, no hidden debt, no inebriation is going to stop me going to Aquaworld Budapest.


I feel like a needy fraud right now

I’ve just been notified that my father has died.


I’m estranged from my family, so I was contacted in a round about way. I was explaining the difficulties we are facing at the moment.

My wife is in remission from Breast cancer, my eldest daughter is being treated at GOSH for JAI and we’re facing eviction and homelessness.

I don’t wish to appear cold but his death is the least of my troubles. Yet I feel like a fraud for relating our pain to an estranged family member.

How fucked up am I