TB;DW TL;DR. Too boring didn’t watch, too long didn’t read, I don’t think you really had the life experiences to write that book.

So a rather inexperienced human being writes a book that is an abuse fantasy, script writers churn it into a film and the sexually inexperienced and naive, who actually have a narcissistic belief that they have experience lap it up.

I feel sorry for real life BDSM-ers,with this production bandwagon skewing the PPP perspective on their lifestyle. I’ve always been annoyed with dilettantes getting involved with something. I did archeology at University a BSc in Archeological Science and the Indiana Jones fantasists always made me fume. Here we have the same. E.L. James marketed BDSM gear doesn’t give you the real abilities and skills for that lifestyle choice, just as a silly hat, a dubious whip and a stupid bag doesn’t make you an archaeologist. Just as a novel and a film don’t give you the knowledge and understanding for it in either circumstance.

It’s interesting that the Secretary never got this traction, is it because E.L. James’ inexperience makes the inexperienced feel comfortable in their naivety? I once tried hook suspension many years ago, this was in part due to watching the film A man called horse and meeting a very experienced domme. It was intense but it made me realise that that lifestyle choice wasn’t for me as I enjoy oro-genital stimulation far too much and BDSM lifestyle take up too much time when I can be doing my preferred things with cock, fingers and tongue with mouth, pussy and arse. My time with the domme was a bit of a fail as she didn’t want her pussy eaten even when we were having ”vanilla” sex and the actual penetrative sex was mediocre at best. I found that very odd, she wanted me in her world, but wouldn’t enter my world, so much for a consensual shard experience.

Once the kids are back at school, I’m temped to go to an afternoon showing to watch the audience rather than the film I think that would be more entertaining.

There are many elements of the BDSM lifestyle community I disagree with, I feel that it does attract a certain number with mental health issues that disguise their problems by becoming ”kinksters”, I also feel that the release of the book and now the film that there are going to be a number of abusers who will use the book and film as a cover for their abusive behaviours and prey upon the naive using it as a pretext.

I have big respect for the BDSM-ers who understand that there is a separation between their choices and others and are open about it, they are due a lot of respect, much in the same way other groups are. Sadly, I feel that E.L. James’ work will create an environment where its forced back out of the open by the (im)moral majority whose morality and values are used to punish those who they don’t accept and respect.

I freely admit I haven’t read the book but I have heard a lot about it, from those who think it’s liberated them to those who have disliked it.