A model for how support in an group should be particularly a family setting

In my former capacity as an employee, being part of teams and leading managing teams, I’ve done a lot to understand the nature of work place support for staff. I think I’ve realised that the majority of models are not quite right.

I was thinking about it washing the dishes and making the lunches today and I think the best model for support is Circe D’Solies high wire acts.

As a couple they practice moves, over and over again in a safe space, but when they are performing, no one notice that each is supporting the other in complex and dangerous moves. The support is transparent and automatic. If on the other hand one of the team is not present during the practice and  familiarisation sessions, the performance will be a disaster.

Where in the work place or the family do we have that level of training, practice and familiarisation that give people the confidence that support is there.

For a high wire act the training aspect is the most important part of the job, but little emphasis is placed on it by the observer.

Interesting concept, could it be used as a new paradigm for couples/family interaction?

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2 thoughts on “A model for how support in an group should be particularly a family setting

  1. Short answer? No! Emphatic No!

    You cannot practice how to intereact with your spouse. When you presuppose that you can you make the actual interaction a performance. Game over.

    • Really are you absolutely sure, two people cannot practice together how certain interactions play out, what their expected roles and duties are, what needs to be considered in order for a safe secure outcome?
      Consider: 9am appointment for a child at a Central London hospital on a weekday. Two parents, two young children, no additional support to look after one of the children, the only working spouse is on a zero day contract therefore no work, no pay. Finances are tight and all income needed. The trip to the hospital will require travelling through central London at peak period, the location of the hospital is near to the working spouses employer. Both parents are well versed at navigating commuter congestion. Both parents know that the child visiting the hospital will be scared and highly-strung. By having shared experiences, knowledge of behaviours and communicating it beforehand they can become practised at a challenging situation and deal with it successfully with the minimum of stress and strain to the children.

      If you thought I was suggesting a more regimented way to enforce a spouse to behave in a certain way, that wasn’t my intention. More it was a lets look at it from a lessons learnt retrospective, we’ve done x activity n times the outcome has ranged from o0 to o4, what could we do to improve, what shouldn’t we do, if I do this then what should you do? Scenario modeling I guess, but with a highwire act with two performers they at the absolute bare minimum must know which routine they will perform.

      I don’t think I could ever practise on my own how to interact with my spouse. We “practice” interaction together all the time. Things like, if I don’t put the toilet seat down in the middle of the night (common courtesy) she’s going to wake me up to tell me. I don’t want to be woken as I won’t get back sleep. That does seem a bit practised to me.

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